What no one tells you about being pregnant.

Being pregnant is great, just ask anyone. It's a joy. You get to make a baby and think about all the great baby and mom stuff you will be doing. You sleep more and no one can give you shit for not wanting to cook dinner. You can't smoke or drink so you are probably the healthiest you have been in a long time.
these are the kinds of things all the books tell you. they prepare you for morning sickness and stabby pains, constipation and bitchiness. What they don't tell you is how alone you will feel and how isolated. how much you will cry.
i don't have any friends with babies or that are pregnant. one acquaintance but not someone that is a friend that i would talk to about personal things. non of my friends are married and few even have significant others. none of them are thinking about having kids any time soon. honestly, i think for most of them if an unexpected pregnancy happened it would probably mean an abortion, to be blunt. and that's fine. but that leaves me out here in pregnancy world all by myself.
first i can't smoke or drink, so i am now no fun. all of my friends start conversations with "i'd love to go out, too bad you can't drink". i have gotten over the fact that i can't drink. drinking is the last thing on my mind. but this means, no one wants to hang out with me. which sucks. yeah, my options are a little limited. yes i get really tired really quickly. it's temporary. bear with me.
this also means that it's hard to have a great time because everyone else is drinking. try hanging out with a group of people and watch them get drunk while you drink juice. tell me how funny they are in relation to how funny they think they are. the answer is going to be "i'm going to bed" because it's boring hanging with a bunch of drunk people when you can't drink.
i don't even know what people talk about or think about any more. their relationships or movies or school. non of which are relative to me. my relationship is different now and revolves around us being parents. we don't fight. we have nothing to fight about. we do everything we can to make eachother happy (mostly him making me happy) we talk about the baby. no one else wants to hear about my unborn child. my friends are not interested in natural birth choices or cloth diapers.

it's just something to be prepared for. i guess. i know i'm not the only one who feels these things and maybe some people don't have this problem.
but yeah, i'm sorta lonely in pregnancy land. just me and the baby, sleeping and playing wii.

Week 13

I'm in second trimester! finally. It is amazing how it crawls by and you think you aren't going to ever get through this hour or this day let alone weeks but before you know it you are 4 months pregnant!
that means i am 1/3 of the way through!

Second trimester is considered the fun part of pregnancy. My belly is coming in, slowly although i have a feeling one day i will wake up with a much larger bump. i'm no longer sick all day or even at all. my energy is coming back and i am generally starting to feel much more like my old self. i have even cooked dinner once or twice, which i didn't do the first 3 months of pregnancy.

Second trimester is such a big deal for pregnant girls because it means your risk of miscarriage has gone way down.

Now our little squirt is the size of a peach!

Vocal chords are forming! how fun! Even though i am pregnant and i feel pregnant and i can often feel the baby in there (well i feel my uterus at least and that full feeling) it's hard to imagine an actual little baby in there! i think this is something most moms experience.

my own mom will be here in less then a week and i can not wait. I am taking a day or two off from work to have some time with my momma. that means i will get to buy more maternity clothes and no longer will i have just one pair of pants. whoo hoo.

unfortunately i am awake much to early to think about much. i am going to play yahoo games, bookworm because i am addicted.
i am going to find out when Mad Men comes back on tv!

exhaustion

Come second trimester you are supposed to get some energy back, i do not have that. i don't think i have ever in my life been more exhausted then i am today. i can barely keep my eyes open. earlier i went to target for some odds and ends. It's about half a mile from the house. i was ok but tired on the walk there. i had a list and i was there for about an hour because i was moving at a snails pace, leaning on my cart nearly with my eyes closed. it took me over half an hour to walk back. then i slept, well i tried. in addition to be exhausted, i also am having trouble falling asleep. great combo.
so now i am just exhausted. my eyes hurt.i have a pain in my abdomen and who knows what weird thing that could be, the baby pushing some organ out of the way i'm sure.
misu and roxie will not leave my side. they are my little shadows now. roxie is becoming much more protective of me, which is adorable and annoying.

hopefully i can stay awake for some Battle Star Gallactica and tea.

Week 12

It's the last week of my first trimester! I'm so happy about this! Look at all the exclamation points. Nothing really to report, i haven't gained any weight. i eat a ton. i am still sleepy but not sick.
I had to buy a pair of maternity jeans last week, cause i just can't fit into anything else now. which is strange, cause i weigh the same. oh and my boobs hurt, alot. i do not remember these growing pains the first time my breasts grew!
Now the squirt is the size of a plum! yummy.

which is roughly the size of a tennis ball, for those of you who are in plum deficient countries but also happen to have the internet. (P.S. if that applies to you, please post a comment letting me know which country has the internet but not plums, k thnx)

My mom is coming in for a week to visit in time for my next prenatal appointment. i am sure she will bring with her some embarrassing stories to tell my boyfriend and we will shop. also, it seems likely that we should have dinner with jp's parents, separately of course, since we would rather not witness a cage fight during dinner. i am pretty interested to see how these grandparents adapt to being civil to each other for their grandchild when the squirt is born or say, has a birthday party. remains to be seen.

in other news, i want a vacation.

Random

My nails have never been so awesome....apparently a great side effect of being pregnant! they are hard and grow super fast (sometimes i snap them on something and have to start over) i am now a fantastic back scratcher!

i love Super Mario Galaxy. I want to be playing it right now but i also want to get to bed by 11pm. if i start playing again i will get too worked up and not be able to relax. But seriously, best boyfriend ever.

My mom should be coming in March! this is really exciting. My mom has actually never seen any of my homes. I am hoping she is able to come for my next prenatal appointment. She will be able to meet my midwife and see the birth center. Also meet my boyfriend, my dog and cat, and friends. See my city. all very exciting.

now, winding down for bed.